Living Beyond “What If?”

Sharing my learnings from the book, Living Beyond “What If?” By Dr. Shirley Davis

Living Beyond “What If?” By Dr. Shirley Davis

In part 1 of this book, Dr. Shirley Davis addresses these and other questions by guiding the reader through a personal journey of self-discovery, a search for significance, and an examination of the self-imposed limitations that can hijack our purpose, power, and possibilities.
 
In part 2, she details the readers’ journies toward realizing their dreams by reimagining their lives, identifying their “why,” and developing a life plan to stay focused and accountable. She describes the right questions to ask, the right mindset to adopt, and the right relationships to build that will enable everyone to live the life he or she has always imagined.
 
Dr. Davis reveals the necessary steps for releasing the limits we place on ourselves as a result of life’s tests, wrong thinking, and bad decisions. She helps readers overcome paralyzing fears that keep dreams on pause and inspires the confidence to jump first and grow wings on the way down.

• At Dr. Shirley Davis’s public speaking events, 90 percent of the audience agrees that they would live their lives differently if they could do it again. They’d live purposefully – with more passion and less procrastination. 
• This book offer strategies to release any mindsets that may be protecting you from disappointments but are ultimately holding you back.
• imagining a different future remains one of the most important first steps in making any big life change.
• Taking a risk can be hugely rewarding. But knowing which risks to take is the real skill. Each time, calculate pros and cons, do extensive research and write detailed notes to map out route to success (this includes an exit strategy)
• Many of us fail to realize our dreams due to procrastination. we tend to put off doing things we know we should do
• The best-selling author James Clear believes that a phenomenon called time inconsistency helps explain why we procrastinate. Time inconsistency refers to the human tendency to value immediate rewards over future rewards. 
• Turn to a method called behavioral chaining, which breaks large tasks into smaller steps.
• procrastination’s not the only reason many people leave their dreams on the table. Often, we get fixated on disempowering questions, like What if I’m not good enough? This kind of mindset can make you feel hopeless, powerless, and worthless.
• when one crosses your mind, consider where it’s coming from. If it’s from another person, ask why you’re giving that individual so much power over your self-worth. Instead of drowning in self-doubt, take inventory of your strengths and positive qualities. Measure your success in terms of your goals, not other people’s
• remember that failure is part of success. In fact, it’s the best way to learn and move forward!
• a lot of that fear is learned behavior. In reality, we’re born with only two fears: the fear of falling and the fear of loud noises. Everything else is either taught or acquired. 
• Sometimes fear is based in reality. But other times it’s just a figment of the imagination. One thing is for certain: it’s impossible to live your dreams when you’re living in fear. 
• Davis has developed six steps to help you navigate terrifying situations big or small.
  • shift how you think about your fears by acknowledging them; naming your fear lessens its power
  • interrogate what it is you’re so scared of.
  • make an effort to try doing the thing that’s bothering you.
  • build your self-confidence by reciting positive affirmations about your unique virtues and talents.
  • when you do conquer a fear, write down what happened and how you managed – you’ll be able to draw on those feelings next time. 
  • keep picturing your dreams coming true. Fears seem like no big deal when you remember what you’re aiming for.
• To achieve your goals, make a plan and find your purpose.
• Humans are social creatures: we need good relationships to be successful. But if you don’t take care of yourself, you’ll find it hard to do the same for others. To be and do your best, you must build your self-confidence. Realizing your dreams becomes an act of self-love. It’s only after you’ve established this most important relationship that you can move on to others.
• there are two tiers to relationships
  • personal board of advisors: that’s trusted family members, friends, and colleagues. 
  • extended network: spend time growing these relationships. Be sure to reach out to people who are different from you – they offer valuable perspectives.
• Once you’ve built your self-confidence, optimized your relationship with yourself and connected with others, it’s time to jump and take a leap of faith.